The Compulsion Loop: Are Shopping, Social Media, and Exercise Becoming Addictions?

In our society, a dedication to fitness is praised, staying connected on social media is normal, and treating yourself to a new purchase is a common pick-me-up. But what happens when these perfectly normal behaviours start to take on a life of their own? What happens when the gym becomes a punishment, the social media scroll becomes a void, and the shopping trip becomes a secret source of shame?

The line between a healthy habit and a harmful behavioural addiction can be incredibly fine. The problem isn't the activity itself, but the relationship you have with it. When a behaviour becomes your primary tool to cope with life, and you lose control over it despite adverse consequences, it may have entered the compulsion loop.

At Shaw Psychology, our Melbourne clinical psychologists help people understand this complex dynamic. This guide will help you examine your own relationship with these common, everyday behaviours.

A behavioural addiction can steal your attention away from the most important parts of your life, leaving you feeling disconnected even when you're surrounded by people.

How to Tell the Difference: The 6-Point Checklist

As we explored in our guide to Griffiths' Model, any behaviour can become an addiction if it meets certain criteria. Ask yourself if your engagement with shopping, social media, or exercise is characterised by:

1. Salience: Has it become the most important thing in your life, dominating your thoughts?

2. Mood Modification: Do you use it to escape, numb, or create a "high"?

3. Tolerance: Do you need to do it more and more to get the same feeling?

4. Withdrawal: Do you feel anxious, irritable, or empty when you can't do it?

5. Conflict: Is it causing arguments, debt, or causing you to neglect other parts of your life?

6. Relapse: Have you tried to cut back but always find yourself slipping back into the same excessive patterns?

When "Retail Therapy" Becomes a Shopping Addiction

"Retail therapy" is a common term, but for some, it's a serious problem. A shopping addiction isn't about overspending once in a while; it's a pattern of compulsive buying to cope with emotional distress.

• The "High": The addiction is not to the items themselves, but to the rush of dopamine experienced during the act of buying.

• The Crash: This high is inevitably followed by a crash of guilt, shame, and anxiety, especially when the credit card bills arrive.

• Secrecy: Hiding purchases from a partner, opening secret bank accounts, and lying about spending are classic red flags.

When "Connecting" Becomes Social Media Addiction

Social media is designed to be addictive, using variable reward schedules (you never know when you'll get a like or a message) to keep you scrolling.

• The Comparison Trap: Compulsive use is often linked to low self-esteem, as you compare your real life to the curated highlight reels of others.

• Fear of Missing Out (FOMO): A powerful driver of withdrawal symptoms; the anxiety that if you're not online, you're missing out on something important.

• The "Phubbing" Effect: The act of "phone snubbing" your real-life companions in favour of your device, causing significant interpersonal conflict.

When "Fitness" Becomes Exercise Addiction

This is perhaps the most deceptive behavioural addiction, as it's cloaked in the virtue of health. But the line is crossed when exercise stops being about well-being and starts being about compulsion.

• Punishment, Not Pleasure: Workouts are no longer enjoyable but are a rigid obligation you feel intense guilt or anxiety for missing.

• Ignoring a Red Light: You continue to exercise despite illness, injury, or extreme fatigue, putting your physical health at risk.

• Social Sacrifice: You consistently cancel plans with friends or family or skip important events because they conflict with your workout schedule.

An example:

Jessica was praised by her friends for her dedication to the gym. But secretly, she was miserable. She had a rigid schedule of two-a-day workouts and would be consumed by anxiety if a meeting ran late and she had to miss one. She was constantly exhausted and had turned down her best friend's wedding invitation because it was at a rural venue with no gym. It was only when her partner told her, "I feel like I'm in a relationship with your gym, not you," that she realised her healthy habit had become an addiction that was isolating her from the people she loved.

(Please note: This is a fictional vignette created for illustrative purposes only.)

Get Help to Break the Loop

If you see your own behaviour reflected in this guide, it's a sign that your relationship with that activity needs attention. You don't have to wait until you "hit rock bottom." Therapy can help you understand the underlying reasons for the compulsion and develop the skills to put these behaviours back in their proper place, so you are in control, not the other way around.

Contact us today on (03) 9969 2190 to start the conversation, or book an initial consultation online here: https://bit.ly/bookshawpsychology.